the musical fruit: movement #19.
song: "spongebob squarepants theme song," painty the pirate & kids
fruit: pineapple
kids these days! give em a crazy, colorful cartoon & an overly happytastic theme song & you're golden. back in my day, we rocked out in front of the TV whilst the sesame street theme song filled us with carefree 70's joy...sunny days, sweepin the clouds away, etc. that was all we needed, really. these days, the kids are all TOTALLY AMP'D on sugar & soda & the interweb, so theme songs like that of sesame street just don't cut it anymore. they need MAXIMUM HAPPINESS in their theme songs.
in the ten years since the show's first episode aired, the "spongebob squarepants theme song" has become one of the most annoying & well-known tv theme songs in existence. kids love it almost as much as they love moon pies & electronic video games! sung by painty the pirate & a bunch of kids, it encourages kids to "drop on the deck & flop like a fish" because they're SO FRIGGIN EXCITED about spongebob. it makes sense. i mean, the dude's not only filled with joy, but he's absorbent, yellow, porous and lives in a pineapple under the sea! if you ask me, he has it pretty sweet. in case hearing the theme song every single time spongebob airs isn't enough for your kid, the track's available on spongebob's greatest hits. MAXIMUM HAPPINESS!
pineapples are tasty & tropical & perfect on the end of a toothpick. personally, i prefer eating them to living in them. if given the option, i wouldn't turn down the opportunity to live in one, but if it was under the sea, i'd probably have to pass. unless they threw in a free set of gills or one of those underwater helmets worn by spongebob's friend sandy cheeks, i just plain wouldn't be able to breathe properly, which would make it hard to fully enjoy my pineapple abode.
since actually purchasing a pineapple & cutting it up my damn self is way more of an undertaking than i'm willing to go through, i decided to take home this can of dole pineapple slices from my office. it'd been sitting around the office since some time last year, when we moved our offices from brooklyn to times sq & it came along. i'm not sure where it originally came from, but for the past year, it's been passed around, living on one desk after another for a few days before moving on to a new & exciting locale. when i cracked it open, i was fully expecting to find something nuclear inside. to my surprise, it was actually still fresh, so i took a few & baked them with chicken, took a few & ate them as a snack & took the rest & set it aside so that one day, i can build myself a pineapple home of my own...on land, of course.