dallas couple finds jesus inside cheese snack (link)
05.16.09 - dallas/forth worth news 11 - by beth wagner

the best thing about finding jesus is that he's so omnipresent & everyone's done such a bang up job spreading his word that you can find him pretty much anywhere. these days, you don't even have to be in a church to find him. he's on t-shirts. he's on tv. as a dallas-area couple discovered, he's even in your afternoon snacks, just waiting for you to eat him. it's like the body of christ you get during mass but cheesier & less like styrofoam.

when the texas couple found a cheeto shaped like jesus, dallas reporter beth wagner just had to find out more about this miraculous discovery. as her hard-hitting journalism explains, one day, on the way out of town, dan bell went to the gas station & picked up a bag of cheetos. in his munching, he came across a particular cheeto that was shaped like jesus & decided to keep it, even naming it "cheesus." a word of advice to my friends & family--if i ever start collecting & naming my snacks (before later trying to sell them on ebay), please contact a doctor on my behalf.

my favorite part about wagner's story is where she speaks to the ubiquitousness of cheeto jesus--"various incarnations of cheesus have shown up before; in houston, missouri, and on the internet site youtube."  no way!  on the internet site youtube?!!!  i mean, houston & missouri make sense, maybe even a conan or ellen appearance, but i didn't think that cheesus would ever go on youtube!  that means they've really hit the big time!  congratulations internet website http backslash www youtube.com!  a word of advice to you regarding your new found fame...don't start worshipping the cheesus, because you'd totally be breaking a commandment if you did...number one, i believe.