#59 - the beautiful people.

a glimpse into the life of some people who are totally beautiful (on the outside, of course/at least):

rod blagojevich - so the former governor of illinois was on letterman tuesday night. that man's swooping helmet bangs are sooooooo astounding & slightly unreal & toupeeish. at one point in the interview, letterman asked him, "do you use shampoo & conditioner?" i think the answer is obvious. daily, his hair is bathed in milk & vegetable extracts & crushed olives or something before being hand-picked by a female gorilla. he's been all "i'm innocent. i'm innocent. i'm innocent" lately. i'd swear that he & roger clemens have the same pr firm, but i can't seem to find his name on the hendricks sports' management's web site...i did, however, come across this report they did that analyzes the greatness of roger clemens' career...at rogerclemensreport.com. beautiful. i was going to write something funny about the report, but that'd mean i'd have to read it first. so anyway, blago, with his beauty hair, it sucks that he's lost the governorship & i get that he wants to clear his name & not have his kids hate him (i've seen the first season of damages), but that man needs to give it a rest prontolike.

rose byrne - speaking of damages, i mean wow. rose byrne is BEAUTIFUL. AUSTRALIAN BEAUTIFUL. i've already hollywood-crush fallen for robin tunney & thora birch & zooey deschanel (& now that i think about it, alexis bledel on some level) & i put them all in the same genus amazicus black-haired ladius as ms byrne, so it only makes sense that she's my current hollywood crush. it helps that her character on damages is all smart & take-charge & sexy & damaged but trying to hide it at the same time...i'm pretty sure these traits make up my perfect female.

the people on beautifulpeople.net - obviously, if you're a beautiful person looking to meet other beautiful people so that you can breed & create your wholly-attractive master race, you should visit the official social networking site of beautiful people. judging by the photos on the site, beautiful people are pretty much white (or asian females), so keep that in mind when you decide to submit your photo to the beautiful people community & have them vote on whether or not you are beautiful enough to become a member...it also helps if you own a tanning salon and/or are unclear on the whereabouts of your shirt. fyi, the site's only supported in internet explorer (obviously), so we now know what browser the beautiful people prefer.

#59 - the beautiful people.
snack: dark chocolate chex mix
drink: archer farms beauty fortified pear lychee water beverage

so as i noted previously, moms always used to treat us to awesome chocolate homemade chex mix, so i love the fact that chex has started making their own mixes (both sweet & salty) and bagging them up (although i suppose they effectively muscled out my mom, which sucks). i'm pretty sure the dark chocolate chex mix is my favorite thus far. it's got m&m-like thingies and chocolate cookies & chocolate-covered pretzels & both white and dark chocolate chex. with a lineup like that, the chex themselves definitely aren't the first thing i reach for in the bag, but even they're good. this particular chex mix has "50% less fat than regular potato chips," which is definitely helpful if i want to be beautiful...& i obviously do.

in case the chex mix doesn't make me beautiful, i'm also drinking archer farms beauty fortified pear lychee water beverage. on the label, there's a mention of "beauty coming from within." i'm not sure why they're even going there since as we all know, the only important beauty in life is the outer beauty. inner beauty is fine for helping out the non outer-beautiful people, but ultimately outer beauty trumps that. i feel beautiful already. after drinking this beverage (& afterwards sufficiently brushing my teeth), i can tell you that this beauty-fortified drink is super sweet...& i don't mean that in a cool, napoleon dynamite slang sort of way, either. fist-bump beautiful people! you saw that movie! you have the vote for pedro shirt!...that is, you did before you puked on it down the shore.

good day. stay beautiful.