pumpktoberfest #36 - into the sea.

film: open water
beer: heavy seas the great'er pumpkin ale / heavy seas great pumpkin ale

for our final horror film of pumpktoberfest 2011, we've got what might possibly be the most boring horror film ever made--2003's open water. it's a film that's loosely based on a true story about two american tourists who went out as part of a scuba diving tour group & ended up getting left behind in the middle of the ocean. why's it so damn boring? well, while the concept of being stuck in the middle of the ocean with no hope for rescue is definitely horrifying, watching it happen to two people is far from it. for half of the movie, you're stuck looking at a dude & a girl & nothing but water all around them. sure there's an occasional brush with an ocean creature or two but c'mon now...yawn.

since it's loosely based on a true story, the filmmakers went the route of using unknown actors & employing a documentary-style visual look. we watch as the dude & girl pack the car & hop a flight & hang out at the hotel & do touristy things...acting like an ACTUAL LIVING COUPLE. eventually, they head out on a boat to go scuba diving as part of a group. when they get out into the ocean, everybody in the group is supposed to first pair up with a buddy so they don't get lost & then head on out exploring. the only kink in that plan is that this cocky dude forgot his mask & isn't able to go out. he stays behind on the boat but when the first pair of people returns to the boat, he ends up borrowing a mask & convincing one of those people to go back out with him so he'll have a buddy. amongst all this, the dude keeping track of people ends up counting this pair twice. they figure everybody's on the boat & the happy tourist couple gets left behind. oops.

from this point on, the film's all "is that a boat?" & "i think something bit me" & the occasional lover's quarrel. they see a shark in the distance. after a while, the girl gets stung by a jellyfish. they take naps & when they awake, they've drifted apart, resulting in a tense moment of "OMG where are you?" that's resolved seconds later when they realize that they've drifted. at this point, they've been in the water for seven hours. the girl pukes & there's a brief moment of humor when the dude suggests "let's swim out of this puke." eventually, they start going a little nutty & yelling at each other. they realize they're pretty much screwed. what they don't realize is that they've been sustaining tiny bites & are leaking blood & the sharks are totally on to them.

around this time, the boat captain finally notices that their stuff is still on the boat, realizes that they're missing & sends out a search crew to find them. do they eventually get saved? do the sharks get a lil' american tourist feast? um, what do you think? if you haven't seen open water before, don't waste eighty minutes of your life waiting to see what happens. what'll happen is next to nothing. you'll try to drown your sorrows in pumpkin beer but it won't work. in the end, you'll still be watching a dude & a girl & a bunch of water.

out on the open seas this pumpktoberfest, pirates be swigging 22 oz bottles of heavy seas the great'er pumpkin ale & its tamer cousin, the heavy seas great pumpkin ale. they be all swashbuckling & tossing people off of planks & shouting "arr arr pumpkin pumpkin arr arr" & shizz long into the night. basically, said pirates are drinking two versions of the same imperial pumpkin ale, with the great'er pumpkin being a malt beverage version that's aged in bourbon barrels. maryland's heavy seas put them both out this september as seasonal releases that are part of their small-batch, high ABV "mutiny fleet" series of beers. with the great'er pumpkin, they went the exclusive route & gave it an even more limited release than the great pumpkin.

near the beginning of the month, i had a couple bottles of the great'er pumpkin but because of its limited release, it wasn't long until i couldn't find them any more. then i had a few bottles of the great pumpkin. when i first tried the great'er pumpkin, i loved it. since it's aged in bourbon barrels & has a 9.0% ABV, it's got a strong alcohol flavor. it's also heavy in both pumpkin & pumpkin pie spices, giving it an overall taste that reminded me a lot of the pumpktoberfest favorite southern tier pumking. unfortunately, by the time i got around to trying the great pumpkin, i still enjoyed it but wasn't feeling it as much. the flavor's similar to that of its bourbon barrel-aged cousin but as it's still 8.5% ABV, the alcohol flavor eventually got to be a bit much for me. so yeah...it's one of the better pumpkin beers i've tried but the alcohol content might be a bit much for some people. if you're a pirate though, you'll probably be just fine with either of heavy seas' pumpkin ales.

...til next pumpktoberfest, have a great year!