the fifty states project #2: WI.

the fifty states project rolls on! today we're warming up the rusty ol' eat!drink!snack! VW bus SHINY NEW EAT!DRINK!SNACK! HUMMER LIMO & heading out to the midwest for a visit to america's dairyland--WISCONSIN! on a personal level, it's one of the thirteen U.S. states i've never stepped foot in. it's not that i hate it or anything like that. in fact, i know a handful of people from the state & they generally speak highly of it. if nothing, i'd like to actually visit madison one day. it's the state capital & home to a quarter-million people, including the campus of UW-madison. people are largely liberal in madison, especially when it comes to voting. as a general rule, i get a kick out of smaller scale, liberal cities like that, so i figure it'd be cool enough.

unfortunately, the rest of the state doesn't always agree with madison's voters. milwaukee (the largest city) tends to vote liberal & the state's voted democratic in the last six presidential elections but in the november 2010 mid-term elections, wisconsinites voted in republican scott walker as their governor, made both houses of the state legislature republican & voted out democrat russ feingold (who had been a U.S. senator since '92) in favor of a republican. apparently, peeps got all swept up in "obama & the democrats totally suck at government" fever...or maybe they were just revisiting their republican roots. after all, ripon, WI claims to be the birthplace of the republican party.

the best part about wisconsin choosing scott wanker as their governor is that he's an asshole with political aspirations. back on valentine's day (love ya wisconsin voters!), he introduced the "wisconsin budget repair bill," legislation designed to fix the state's multi-billion dollar budget deficit by severely changing the labor rights of state workers. there are a thousand & one reasons why the bill sucks, but one of the main things was that it stripped the unions' collective bargaining rights. in response, fourteen democratic senators fled the state so that the bill couldn't be brought to a vote & huge protests started flaring up at the capital. it's only been crazier since then & there's a lot more to it, but i'd much rather refer you to the folks over at madison, WI's tank riot. their sorta-recent podcast on the WI shenanigans spells out a lot of what's going on.

wisconsin's not just protests & shitty government though! on no, sir. there's something for everyone. you like cheddar? gouda? havarti? wisconsin produces 1/4 of the nation's cheese, broseph. wausau is apparently the ginseng capital of the u.s. if you're a sports fan, the packers play in green bay & those dudes totally won the super bowl this year. the UW badgers played in the rose bowl & survived multiple rounds of MARCH MADNESS. if you like baseball you can root for the milwaukee brewers & if you're a hoops fan you cheer on the milwaukee bucks. i wouldn't suggest doing either of those things though. harley davidson is based out of milwaukee & les paul came from waukesha, so i guess they have some cred as a badass american state.

also, wisconsin is responsible for spawning the members of the violent femmes, the band that wrote this song, a song that i wouldn't have even known existed if a friend had not told me about it a few days ago...& if he hadn't turned me on to it, you'd be seeing "blister in the sun" in this spot:

...so, kudos, wisconsin. keep fighting the good fight.

P.S. - your accent is adorable.

snack: back to nature fudge striped cookies
drink: lakefront new grist beer

it would've been way too cliche if i'd gone with some sort of cheddar-based snack to honor the state of WI. instead, i opted for a box of back to nature fudge striped cookies, which are basically a "healthier" take on keebler fudge stripe cookies. as a kid, i used to eat the keebler ones off of my finger like it was going out of style or would make me popular or something, so when i found the back to nature version at the store, i got all nostalgiac & shizz & had to get them. for legal reasons, these ones are "fudge striped cookies," not "fudge stripe cookies." also, they aren't made by elves. they do feature a list of all-natural ingredients and zero artificial preservatives, flavors & colors though. surprise surprise, they're made by a company based in hippie madison.

when it comes right down to it, back to nature's fudge striped cookies taste almost identical to keebler's version. they're both yummy & are both made with shortbread cookies with a layer of fudge on the bottom & drizzles of fudge across the top. i suppose that back to nature's version tasted a little bit cleaner, but for all i know that could be my taste buds buying into all the liberal "all-natural" mumbo jumbo propaganda. i sort of feel bad about putting elves out of work in saying this, but if paying more doesn't bother you (at least $1.50 more per package in brooklyn), you should definitely get the back to nature version. sorry elves. i would've thought that the fact that you live in trees would've made you a bit more all-natural.

millwaukee's home to miller brewing's main brewery. while the thought of living the high life was quite tempting, miller's beer is basically undrinkable swill, so i chose a beer from another milwaukee brewery--lakefront brewery. for some reason, their lakefront new grist beer made me think of the phrase "grist for the mill," which for some reason made me think of labor so, um...theme. oh crazy brain. anyhow, it's made from sorghum & rice extract & is totally gluten-free. when i brought it up to the counter, the guy there actually looked at me & asked "gluten-free?" i explained that i wanted a wisconsin beer & he sort of tried to talk me out of getting the gluten-free one, as lakefront has a bunch of other, much tastier beers. eventually, he relented after i added that, "it works well as part of the theme i'm going for." he was probably thinking something along the lines of, "ok...you theme your drinking. whatever, dude."

in retrospect, i probably should have let myself get talked out of it & gone with one of lakefront's other beers. while the new grist isn't awful, it's severely lacking in flavor & body & character. i guess that's what it's like to live a gluten-free life...it's all one dull, empty, tasteless slog. JK LOL, gluten-free friends! anywho, the beer has hints of sweetness & fruitiness to it, but those hints barely register. to be blunt, the flavor's so faint that it's really only a step or two above a high life. if you're going to get one, let yourself be talked out of it.

since i'm against leaving you on a down note, here's a ten-minute documentary on "the wizard of waukesha"...enjoy: