nosh nook #181 - monday, november 23, 2009

cupcake complaints aired to weymouth school committee member (link)
11.23.09 - weymouth news - by ed baker

since launching the nosh nook back in march, i've written about a ton of cases where folks are in a tizzy about their kids' nutrition, especially at school. i've featured so many stories about crusading moms & initiatives & legislation that sometimes i feel like the "won't somebody please think of the children" angle is the only story being told in the world of food. i'm not saying that it's not important that kids eat healthy, but it's starting to get old. i can only come across so many "five hip, healthy, after school snacks for teens" articles before i snap & start taking hostages. are there really moms out there who still haven't figured out that carrot sticks are better than doritos? if there are, do we really need to force it down their throats through legislation & initiatives & news story after news story? don't we have better things to discuss?

i'm not the only one who feels this way. according to the weymouth news, there's been a bit of a hubbub in weymouth recently about a wellness policy approved by the school committee. the policy, which "establishes nutrition and physical fitness objectives for students in all grades," urges teachers to limit the amount of times that kids bring cupcakes to school for their birthdays. eventually, parents complained about the cupcake-hating policy to school committee member karen berry. she found that interesting because as the weymouth news notes, she "rarely receives calls from parents about how budget cuts will impact their child’s education, but she gets plenty of calls concerning a misunderstanding about policy on birthday cupcakes in the classroom." you hear that, weymouthians? where are your priorities?

the policy was put in place back at the beginning of 2007, which was fairly early in the recent healthy kid craziness, so parents should be used to it by now. as it is, cupcakes aren't even banned by the policy. all the policy does is "suggest that teachers limit the number of birthday parties they hold in their class each month and encourage healthy food consumption by students." although she was part of the committee that initially put the wellness policy in place, karen berry wishes that "people would be as attentive to the budget challenges rather than an eight-year-old who would be crying because he or she could not bring a cupcake to a birthday party at school." that's some shoddy english right there, but you get what she's trying to say. they put the policy in place. now it's time to move on to something more important. let's stop wasting so much time on cupcakes.

nosh nook #175 - friday, november 13, 2009

'jersey fresh' a mantra in school cafeterias (link)
11.12.09 - philly.com - by james osborne

are you "jersey fresh?" do you possess slicked, oily hair, a shirt half-unbuttoned & a general aura of douchebaggery? do you want to fight me and/or kick my ass? you sir, are jersey fresh. you have enormous hair, overwhelming perfume & orange, leathery skin and/or fake boobs? do your friends call you a "skank?" yeah? sounds like you're a jersey fresh lady, lady. are you stuck between a rock (nyc) & a hard place (philly)? does your turnpike smell funny down around exit 13? you're totally jersey fresh. get down with your mirrortastic bad self. please don't get mad at my depiction of you, jersey. i mock because i love.

according to philly.com, "jersey fresh" has recently become a mantra in school cafeterias. that mantra has nothing to do with AXE body spray & a longing to get laid down at the shore though. this mantra is all about jersey's tubby youth eating healthier. it's a trend in schools these days & if any state's trendy, it's jersey, so they're on board. philly.com's article focuses on one township in particular--cherry hill--where they're going nuts promoting locally grown fruits & veggies to their students. instead of letting them loose on bags of cheetos, they have to worry about students mobbing the fruit cart.

cherry hill's a suburb where the median family income's just under six figures, so i guess they're the perfect demographic for creating an anti-junk food program in the schools. the program puts an emphasis on being a locavore (or as osborne calls it-- "localvore") & gets kids pumped about all jersey-grown fruits & veggies. philly.com asked dittmar gagnon, a senior football player, what he thought about the changes. "i think I'm eating healthier now than in middle school. back then, it was all reheated tacos and other junk. just today, they added cherry tomatoes." cherry tomatoes! they have football players talking about cherry tomatoes! that's the sort of thing that's going to get the cougars crushed in next week's game against atlantic city. i'm not a gambling man, but i'd put money on it.

nosh nook #83 - wednesday, july 8, 2009

USDA to oversee school snack food: senate ag chair (link)
07.07.09 - reuters - by roberta rampton/walter bagley

this just in: there's no need to worry. the government cares about you. they want to make sure that you're safe & healthy and if that requires a whole bunch of regulation, so be it. this is especially true when it comes to food & your diet. it's a good thing, because we all know that we can't be trusted to eat healthy. a few weeks back, california became the first state to require restaurants to post calorie counts on their menus, following regulation established here in nyc a few years back. every day, it seems like there's another politician with another brilliant legislative plan that'll save our nation's children from the obesity epidemic.

the government will begin dealing with school lunch legislation as early as summer's end & as reuters reports, iowa's tom harkin, the new chairman of the USDA, is a politician, so he has an obesity-combatting plan too--regulate school vending machines. brilliant! the USDA already "oversees the contents of school lunches and bars the sale of foods with minimal nutritional value," but their reach doesn't cover vending machines, so back in april, harkin introduced a bill that would extend regulation to include the evil snack dispenseries.

kevin concannon, obama's nominee for head of the USDA's food & nutrition programs, wants to work with harkin to change americans' deplorable eating habits. he's run "food stamp and public nutrition programs in iowa, maine and oregon during his career," so he should know what's best for the other forty-seven states. still, as much as he wants to regulate & improve our children's eating habits, "he's seen 'pushback' from schools that count on revenue from vending machines to pay for student activities." that's why we need vending machine legislation. without it, schools won't know what's good for them & if schools don't know what's good for them & the government is helpless to do anything about it, MeMe roth will only get louder...& we don't want that. won't someone please think of the children?

nosh nook #69 - thursday, june 18, 2009

nutrition advocate and pain in the ass MeMe roth profiled in times (link)
06.17.09 - village voice - by roy edroso

seriously, will somebody please tell MeMe roth to put a sock in it? for those not familiar with miss MeMe, she's a concerned parent & the head of national action against obesity (NAAO) & she's been all over the place recently enacting her crusade (& i use that word in the most literal sense possible) against junk food & snacks. it's not like i'm a proponent of childhood obesity or anything, but there's a difference between fighting for a cause & acting liking a complete psycho in defense of your cause & MeMe's definitely in the latter category.

it's no mistake that her name is "MeMe," because she's all "me me!" & loves making a scene.  gawker referred to her as "new york's worst food nazi mom" and as the village voice notes, MeMe "had the cops called on her 'when she absconded with the sprinkles and syrups on a table where members [of the YMCA] were being served ice cream.'" as if that's not nutty enough, she went & "compared marketers of high-fat foods to rapists."  obviously.  sure, healthier foods are better, but there's something quite unhealthy about her rib-exposing bikini shot in times sq that accompanies the gawker article.

wow. for once, i'm actually aligning myself with the village voice.  i used to read the grandaddy of america's dying alternative newspaper every week without fail, but through a perfect storm of working for ny press, their being bought by new times media & their firing of writers & accompanying declining quality, i haven't picked one up in years, which is weird because i'm totally alternative!...no so alternative that i'd protest against girl scout cookies though.

nosh nook #61 - monday, june 8, 2009

ohio state team takes 'buzz lightyear' snack idea to anaheim (link)
06.07.09 - north texas e-news - by ohio state university

to infinity and beyond, bitches! if you're like me & know next to nothing about the toy story movies, those five words (bitches not included) will make it seem like you actually do. it's the catch phrase of toy story hero buzz lightyear, so it's a perfect conversation starter for when you have to talk to children! also, you should use the word "woody" a lot. there's a woody in toy story.

anyway, so as this north texas e-news article (written by ohio state university...each student contributed a letter!) says, five grad students from ohio state's department of food science & technology in the college of food, agricultural & environmental sciences (say that five times fast!) have come up with an awesome buzz lightyear-themed snack, just in time for the next toy story movie & buzz lightyear ride. dubbed the "buzz lightyear star command snack," it's "star- and moon-shaped crackers with peanut-butter banana and chocolate dipping sauces--in a disposable wristband container."

with these snacks, you not only get to pretend you're a cartoon toy, but you get half a serving of fruits & veggies and a half serving of whole grains.  for the buckeyes who came up with these munchables as part of a product development competition, they have the opportunity to win "$2,500, a disney trophy and a VIP tour of disneyland park."  i hear that the disneyland VIP tour gets you access to disney's underground lair, where they conduct their twisted experiments.  that's the sweetest treat of all.