will you look at that! if you're reading this, that means that you've made it through 2009. congrats. i knew you could do it! well, not you, phil. frankly, your immortality is SHOCKING...but everyone else...i knew you could do it! since we're done with the living hell that was 2009 & already a week or so into 2010, i figured it was high time that i got on with putting together my year-end best of lists. at the end of 2008, i recapped my top ten albums, snacks & drinks of the year. this year, i'm going to keep in the same realm & offer up my top ten TRACKS & SNACKS OF 2009!

just like last year, since my main music obsession these days is mostly in the field of indie rock, all ten tracks on the list are by indie rockers. there are a ton of tracks that i could have included here, but we only have room for ten, folks. the first songs to get cut were those from other years, from miles benjamin anthony robinson's "buriedfed" to o.d.b.'s "got your money" to final fantasy's "this lamb sells condos."

from this year, there are a few honorable mentions. there's peaches' "serpentine" & morrissey's "something is squeezing my skull." in the hip hop world, there's the cool kids' "broadcasting live," vinnie scullo's "eyehearthiphop" & kid cudi's "pursuit of happiness" (with MGMT & ratatat). the last track to get cut from the list was animal collective's "my girls," which i listened to extensively for the first two months of the year before i just got plain sick of it & it fell out of favor. regardless, it still makes me happy when i hear it. so yeah...lots of good music this year. grab a snack & a drink, pull up a chair & let's get to my top ten tracks!

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hey, remember that show the sopranos? yeah. me too. i was a definite latecomer to it. i heard enough about it when it was on the air, but other than a few months in boston a few years back, i never had hbo, so my opportunities for keeping up with it were essentially nil, especially in that pre-itunes era. i eventually got around to watching the entire series straight through from beginning to end over a two week period about two years ago, shortly after the series had already ended. it's been a while since then, so over the past week, inspired by a stumbled-upon beverage, i went back & watched both parts of the final season, the one with that infamous final scene.

like i mentioned, i initially watched all six seasons of the show (with the split sixth season, sort of like seven seasons, but who's tallyin'?) straight through in a mad dash, so i was devouring a lot of character & story info at once. this time round, going in, i knew there'd be a ton of things i hadn't noticed or comprehended the first time through. i was definitely watching more from an entertainment perspective that first time through, so i was ready to analyze away & let the critic in me spill out this time. after all, with twenty-one episodes in the season, there's a lot of story packed in there.

take the soprano family. while i could care less about meadow going to college or carmela's spec house, the relationship between tony & a.j. during the last season is nothing short of awesome. as tony struggles to maintain his power as head of the dimeo crime family, a.j.'s struggling against a crushing depression that flies in the face of what tony thinks makes a "man." although our circumstances were less extreme & my dad worked at the post office, i couldn't help but think of my own struggles connecting with him when i watched them interact.

when the show was in its original run, there was an obvious fixation on "who's gonna get whacked this week?" in that final season, it takes seven episodes for anyone significant to get whacked & other than one other major whacking a few episodes later, the first half of the season's virtually whack free. looking back at how the season plays out, the lack of solid whacking during the first half definitely makes the second half whackings all that more powerful.

with less whacking, there's even more focus on the family than usual. sorry. i just wanted to use the words "whacking" & "focus on the family" in the same sentence. there's always been a focus on the soprano family, but in the final season, there's a lot of focus on how vito's coming out affects his family, how chris deals with his dead wife & new wife/baby, how paulie handles finding out who his real mom is, how bobby still struggles for respect even though he's tony's brother-in-law & the effects that johnny sack's prison sentence & cancer have on his family.

if you haven't seen the last two episodes yet & still want to, sorry but i'm going to speak to them now. you need to get with the times. it's been over two years since the last episode aired. in the penultimate episode, the scenes where the lupertazzi family quickly whack bobby & leave sil in a coma are epic. we spent eighty-four episodes getting to know them (but who's tallyin'?), so the raw violence of their deaths is SO powerful, especially with bobby, who's nice to a fault & has only killed one person in his life. as for the last episode & specifically the final scene, it's been analyzed to death, so i'm not going to get into all the symbolism & whatnot, but given two things--there's a sketchy dude who goes into the bathroom to tony's right shortly before the scene cuts to black & there was a scene in the opening episode of the second half of the season where bobby asks tony "you probably don't even hear it when it happens, right?"--i've decided that tony got whacked at the end of the episode. mystery solved.

#128 - i tallyin'?
snack: marinated mozzarella balls & boar's head beef salami
drink: sopranos chianti soda



with all that sopranos, i felt it appropriate to eat like a soprano. i would've picked up some gabba goul or made some lincoln logs if i knew what the hell either of them were, so instead, i picked up a tub of marinated mozzarella balls & a half pound of boar's head beef salami from the corner bodega. at first, i asked if they had capicola, not realizing that the dudes are muslim & don't serve any pork. my bad...& a happy ramadan to you, sir. instead, the deli dude suggested that i get some of the boar's head beef salami, so i did. i don't need to be eating pork anyhow. as for the marinated mozzarella balls, i made the decision to get them all by myself. my mom would've been quite proud of me.

beef salami's way different than regular salami. they aren't even close to the same thing. regular salami's spicy & sausagelike, all flecked with pork fat & herbs & spices. the beef salami's essentially a bunch of beef shaped like salami, with no spices or fatty deposits or anything built in. that doesn't mean i didn't like it though. it actually has a sweeter taste to it & when you wrap a slice around one of the mozzarella balls, the sweet beefy salami flavor melds with the oil & sun-dried tomato & spices of the mozzarella marinade. it's actually quite the delightful snack. in fact, i've already gone back to the bodega for more twice this week.

i came across the bottle of sopranos chianti soda last week whilst at eagle provisions, the polish market with a huge beer selection a few blocks from my place, up on 5th ave. it's one of three sopranos-themed sodas put out by hbo, along with the limencello & amaretto flavors. at first, i thought that the bottle, which has a 2006 HBO copyright on the back, might be some relic from the bush era, but the sopranos soda seems to still available for sale online, so i told myself that it was still relatively fresh. other than being italian soda, i'm not sure where the connection to the sopranos is, since i can't remember seeing anyone drink an italian soda at any point on the show. maybe i should check out the deleted scenes in the box set just to be sure.

i drank it during my first night of episodes, when nobody was getting whacked. it was a fitting beverage for the first half of the season...sort of. the first half was laid back, with the limited whacking & character exploration. the chianti soda was laid back as well, but in a less cool way. i've had my fair share of the archer farms (target) brand italian sodas & those things are the bomb. you'd think that a soda infused with the spirit of italian wine & gangsters would be a little more hardcore, but the sopranos soda's far from it. it was essentially like drinking a bottle of watery, over-sweetened juice with minimal carbonation. i hope i don't get whacked for saying this, but just like with david chase & tony's fate, i'm going to leave the other two sopranos soda flavors to the imagination. here's to hbo redeeming itself with the tru blood beverage, which will be available next monday. you'd better believe i'm going to drink hbo's blood.

ladies! let's you & i have a chat. dudes! lean back & pay attention. this is about ladies first & whatnot. maybe you could learn something. so ladies, who wants to enter into some sort of mate/partner in crime/random sex partner/ridiculous conversationalist arrangement? btw, sorry to exclaim at you like that at the opening. it's just that i'm a bit short & sometimes have trouble attracting attention, so i figured i'd give a "!" a shot. i'm actually fairly mild mannered, but have my moments if i don't feel weird around you. anyway, enough about me...let's hear about you, specifically what i'd like you to be like.

you: 5'6" or under, in possession of cool hair on top, flat shoes on bottom, random stories in your brain & a sense of nerd cool on your lips. you can pick a good beer & a good wine & a solid five-song string of jukebox awesomeness. you know why dan savage is just as cool as fred savage & why michael savage is ruining the good savage name. you'll remember that my favorite stuffed gorilla for much of childhood was named george, but he wasn't curious. when i've told you a story about that before, you'll have maybe listened the first time & will recognize which parts of my story have changed, but keep them to yourself & wonder what else i'm making up, because you're SUPER DEVIOUS...& you're so cute when you're being devious.

& you're so pretty when you're faithful to me, so since i'm a serial monogamist, if i'm paying attention to you, that's because you're pretty friggin awesome, so i'm only paying attention to you...something to keep in mind. why are you awesome? well, you're fine with the fact that you've hit 30, because you've got tons of time & you know so because you totally know stuff about genetics...although the future of social security sort of worries you. plus, you're cute, so f "age ruins cute." attitude helps. i seem to get along best with L.W.A. (ladies with attitude), so i might as well keep that streak alive until i get stabbed or something. heat of passion! bring on the attitude ladies. also, your making out & hand-holding skillz must be up to snuff. gross skinniness discouraged. food appreciation a must. wordperfect a plus. apply within. new yorkers preferred. those from other locales with ready access to travel also accepted. EOE.

me: 5'6" or under, mid-30s but looking (mostly) mid-20s. cougar bait. from NH with stints in boston. been in brooklyn since five months before 9-11, which, as the bumper sticker says, i will never forget. thought i was going to be a baseball player & then an architect & then a filmmaker & then around music. currently on the last one, but thinking of going into sexy international corporate espionage. ooh! you must be good at spying, but not on me, ladies. i want a house, a pet could be interesting, a kid might be cool. since we're both super smart, that kid'll have a good chance of curing or running something. before that happens though, i like traveling, but don't do it enough. you probably should want to escape to places as well. we'd go on adventures! i'm comfortable doing stuff by myself, but it'd be cooler with you, madame.

my favorite author is reinaldo arenas, although it's been a while since i've read him, so all his books have blended into one mess in my head. i haven't read a full book in almost two years probably. it's sort of a shame, but i watch & listen instead to get the stimuli. often, when we're out in large groups of people or even when we're alone, i'll be all quiet. it's all good. no need to freak, although since i'm asking for some attitude, i won't fault you for it entirely if you do. i just like watching people interact. i promise it's not creepy. not to get ahead of myself here, but if we hit it off & can manage to hold it together for a good enough period of time, i've always wanted a home sort of like my parents' place, 45 minutes from a major city, but with a ton of trees all over the place, something preferably with a cute downtown. date me! i dare you! you could also tell your friends or your sister or your sister's friends. i dare them too.

#116 - i dare you to date me.
snack: chevre du miel (goat's cheese), pitted dates & dare cracked pepper water crackers
drink: two brothers domaine dupage french style country ale



when we're having a night where we hate people (but are cool with each other, of course) we will sit in your/my apartment (yours if you have cable) & snack on chevre du miel (goat's cheese), pitted dates & dare cracked pepper water crackers. i'm doing it tonight whilst tangentially watching mister lonely, but it's just not the same without you here. you could be my missus lonely! oh! btw, i have netflix again. we could watch movies & break out some soft belgian goat cheese & slice off a piece for you & a piece for me & then we'd sit there with a knife each, watching breaking bad & doing crosswords & spreading cheese onto dates & dare all natural cracked pepper water crackers. it will be the classiest thing we'll do all week other than your friend's art opening, but i refuse to think of reading from the bible whilst naked as art, so that doesn't count.

you'll really like the goat cheese. you'll have to or i'll ask you to leave. it's got hints of honey mixed with products from the teat of a goat (chevre for the classy lassies) & like i mentioned, it comes from the same country as the guy who created the smurfs. you'll find that fact HILARIOUS. you might even have a coincidental t-shirt on hand that takes it to the next level. oh how we'll laugh about your t-shirt. we'll also dare each other to eat the crackers, but that'll end quickly when one of us takes the dare & soon after takes a header off a chair. then we'll laugh...limp & laugh.

we'll drink some beer along with it & it'll be two brothers domaine dupage french style country ale, since that's what i randomly drank a few nights ago & then blogged about today. it'll be how we first started dating, so it'll be memorable to the max, but in french. it'll be like a john cusack film, but with less big hair & more big boombox. you'll call me out on the fact that the beer's not really french. you'll mention that it's from warrenville, IL, in west chicago right near the fermi national accelerator lab. you'll explain to me what the fermi national accelerator lab is. i'll remember "protons." we'll laugh & both wonder where the cat is for a brief moment. then we'll laugh some more.

we'll finish our beers whilst washing down the cheesy date dares & you'll give the two brothers french style country ale a 7.3, but i'll give it a 7.7 just to feel like i'm in charge. we might as well make out by this point, because we're getting along pretty well & you're obviously everything that i'm looking for in a prospective mate/partner in crime/random sex partner/ridiculous conversationalist. do you feel the same?

if yes, let's definitely make out.
if maybe, we should probably make out to break the tie.
if no, we should probably make out anyhow.

who knows? what if one of us gets smooshed by a truck tomorrow & we never get to find out? seriously though, don't get smooshed by a truck tomorrow. you'd be dead & i'd be scarred for life through coincidence & nobody wants that...not even glenn beck. you think he's an ass too? we should definitely date.